Classmate: Alden Yasuda.
Although your words are easy to comprehend, sentence fluency is lacking. Furthermore, your words should be less repetitive and grammar errors should be minimized. You should enhance your paper with more advanced vocabularies. Your hook is wonderful though. And you have effectively drawn associations between the plotline and biblical doctrines.
Classmate: Caleb Noble
Although the essay comprises a decent structure, much of the thesis are not addressed by the body paragraphs. In your thesis, you stressed the irony and significance of Amir’s ignorance of the truth, right? Yet further details about that were not disclosed in the consecutive paragraphs. You also questioned how Amir’s deeds would differ had he not been oblivious to the truth. Yet that was not touched upon by any of the body paragraphs. You included amazing details in the book that clearly lent support to your claims. However, there is room for improvement in terms of minimizing grammatical errors and using advanced English phrases.
Classmate: Joshua Leung
Although most sentences are fluent, word choice could be developed with the addition of high-order vocabulary. Minimal grammatical errors are present in the piece. A thesis should be present in the essay as well, for it is a necessary component in any essay.
Classmate: Dorcas Seto
This piece was written with minimal grammar errors. Although word choice could be more advanced, overly the essay is easy to comprehend. Sentences are mostly eloquent, yet the essay could be strengthened if a thesis is present.
Classmate: Rainbow Law
his is an essay with exceptional quality. Although word choice could be boosted with the addition of higher-order vocabularies, the piece was extremely organized and eloquent. Your essay is one of the few with a thesis present. Grammatical errors are virtually nonexistent. And it comprises a defined structure with a defined thesis, body, and conclusion.
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